Oliver’s great gift was to reveal to me all that habit, lack of distance and impatience were preventing me from seeing for myself, and beyond that to come up with simple but inspired suggestions that would never have occurred to me, but whose sharpness and perceptiveness seemed blindingly obvious once I’d had the time to digest them. Honest, patient, supportive and tough throughout the entire process, his contribution to The Madness of Grief could not be overstated.